The Song Playing in Your Heart

What song is playing in your heart?

Have you ever listened to a song so many times that you can still hear it… even when it’s not playing?

Like it’s just there.

In your mind.

In the background.

This has happened to me so many times.

But one day I realized…

It wasn’t just music I was replaying.

It was a message.

A quiet, constant song in my heart that said:

“I’m not safe.”

“Something bad is going to happen.”

And I lived from that place.

Anxiety.

Panic.

Always bracing for impact.

Always looking ahead, waiting for the next thing to go wrong.

That was the song on repeat for years.

Until it broke me.

Until I hit rock bottom in 2002 and realized I didn’t know how to play anything different.

But something began to shift.

Not overnight…

But slowly.

Deeply.

Over time.

As I turned toward God.

As I got still.

As I stopped simply knowing about Him and began experiencing His presence…

Something changed.

I didn’t just hear truth.

I experienced it.

I felt held.

I felt seen.

I felt loved.

I felt…

Safe.

And the more I experienced that, again and again…

The more a new song began to play.

“I am held.”

“I am supported.”

“God will take care of me.”

Life didn’t suddenly become easy.

There were still unexpected turns.

Health scares.

Raising my autistic son.

Military life.

So many unknowns.

But through every single one…

I was carried.

And that built something in me that fear never could.

Trust.

So now…

When my mind tries to return to the old song…

The “what if this happens?”

Or…

“What if that happens?”

I gently change what’s playing.

Not by force.

But by returning to truth.

God will provide.

God will guide me.

God will give me what I need, when I need it.

Because He always has.

You can live bracing for life…

Or you can live held through it.

Hard things will still come.

That’s part of being human.

But you don’t have to spend your life fearing them.

There is a place of peace.

A place of being deeply supported and held…

No matter what comes.

I know.

Because I’ve lived both.

If the song in your heart has been…

“I’m not safe.”

“I’m scared.”

I see you.

I was you.

And there is another way.

A truer song.

A steadier place.

One that God has been quietly inviting you into all along.

~~~~~~~

Part of the Breadcrumbs collection by Abby Lewis—true stories that leave room for God to speak.